


The Red Bull Chronicles 1 : A Leap Into The Unknown?

by redbullf1angel



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-27
Updated: 2014-02-27
Packaged: 2018-01-14 00:45:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1246381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redbullf1angel/pseuds/redbullf1angel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Welcome to what I hope – time to write and courage to post permitting – will be the start of a series of stories based around my favourite team on the grid – Infiniti Red Bull Racing. And I will make no secret of the fact that my favourite F1 slash pairing just has to be Sebastian Vettel and Mark Webber, and these stories will centre around their developing love for each other, with all its ups and downs. My stories are of course all pure fiction. Some of them may be loosely inspired by events that have happened, though having said that, some actual events I may adapt, ignore or play around with especially with timelines. After all, I am writing total fiction! At the end of the day, my stories are just the ramblings of a crazed F1 addict… and I hope someone out there will enjoying reading them as much as I enjoy writing them….</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Red Bull Chronicles 1 : A Leap Into The Unknown?

Author’s note:

Post-race and post-celebrations Monaco 2010…

Mark had continued his fine form from his win in Spain the previous weekend, to claim pole and then a dominating victory in Monaco, with Seb coming second and snatching fastest lap. The celebrations on the Red Bull’s floating energy station were memorable to say the least, with virtually the whole team ending up in the pool on the top deck, but even more so thanks to Mark and Seb leaping off the side there into the harbour! It’s one of my favourite memories of the two together as team mates and a perfect place I think to start…

-

“You pair of prize idiots!”

Mark and Sebastian stood dripping wet in front of an equally dripping wet Christian. At least with the team principal, his drowned look was due to just two reasons. Firstly, there had been the champagne with which his drivers had taken great delight in soaking him with after they’d collected their trophies, especially seeing as he often didn’t come to the podium to collect the winning constructor’s trophy, preferring to share the honours with other team members. His dampness was, however, mainly due to the second reason – he’d been unceremoniously pushed into the swimming pool that had formed the centrepiece of celebrations on the team’s floating energy station at the Monaco quayside. Yes, his drivers were also wet due to the same reasons, but then things had gotten slightly out of hand… well, at least according to the team principal.

“I can’t believe you two did that!” Christian exclaimed exasperatedly. “It’s one thing to end up into the pool but to launch yourselves off the top here into the harbour…!” Words failed the normally calm and unflappable Englishman. “You could have injured yourselves or even worse!”

“But we didn’t!” sighed Mark, rolling his eyes. In his books, the jump into the harbour hadn’t been that much of a dare-devil feat – far less dangerous in his eyes than tearing round a narrow street circuit at speeds of well in excess of hundred miles an hour! He couldn’t see why the boss was making such a fuss. But then the Aussie was used to the action-man stuff thanks to his preference, and to be honest, love of rugged outdoor training.

“You could have been!” Christian continued ranting. “What on earth possessed you both?”

“We were penned in and over the side was the only way out!” Seb explained, shrugging his shoulders.  

“Yeah, it seemed like a good idea at the time, mate!” reasoned Mark.

“Ja, and fun!” sniggered Seb, nudging Mark with his elbow, and the Aussie no longer could keep a straight face and started chuckling too.  

Christian sighed and couldn’t help but think of himself as a headmaster telling off two naughty school boys for some prank. Both his drivers were still on such an adrenalin fuelled high after the race and the celebrations.

“What on earth ever possessed me to sign you both?!” he wondered aloud wearily.

“We are the best!” Seb confidently said.

“The best in bringing out the mischievous worst in each other!” Christian despaired, waving a finger at them both. “Today’s stunt just proves that!”

“But we bring out the best in each other and the cars on the track and that’s what matters, mate!” Mark insisted seriously.

Christian knew they were right. They had to be one of the strongest all-round pairings, if not the strongest, on the grid right now. He just sighed and ran a hand through his wet hair, knowing that he wasn’t really angry with them – they were fine and the jump into the harbour had made for a great impromptu publicity stunt, topping off the outrageous public celebrations for the rebel team on the grid in fine style. And after all, following on from the team’s sixth pole position on the trot, Mark had won at Monaco - the jewel in the F1 calendar - with Seb second. Then there was more to be happy with right now – his drivers were top of the driver’s championship, equal on points, but with Mark taking the top spot as he’d won two races compared to Seb’s one, and thus the team had leap-frogged Ferrari to take the lead in the battle for the constructor’s title. He couldn’t have asked for anything more from the team, and from his drivers. It had been a perfect weekend.

“Just go and get changed out of those sopping wet overalls,” he instructed. “Or the next thing we’ll know is you’ll both have pneumonia!”

“Yes, dad,” sniggered Seb, and that just set Mark off laughing again.

Christian just sighed. “Just go!”

He watched as his two drivers trudged off together in the direction of their private rooms in the back of the energy station and he couldn’t help but smile, not only in amusement at them, but also in proudness. No, he certainly wouldn’t want to replace either of them – in fact, he knew he’d fight like hell to keep both of them when he sat down with each of them to discuss their contracts and fortunately, Dietrich was of the same opinion. Not only were they talented drivers, but they complimented each other perfectly – Mark had the experience and Seb the youthful enthusiasm – and they worked well together, not only for the good of themselves but ultimately for good of the team. And the team was everything to Christian - they all worked hard altogether and they all played hard altogether. Other team principals might look down on him with his rather informal and unconventional style of management let alone the fact that he was the youngest and least experienced in F1 amongst them all, but none of them could deny that he was currently spearheading the most successful team on the Formula One grid right now, with Red Bull emerging for the second season in a row as serious championship contenders. So much for everyone writing off Red Bull taking over the Jaguar team, saying it was just a publicity stunt for the energy drinks company!

Unconventional… Christian was suddenly struck by a thought.

“Mark, you’d better have a suit and black tie for tonight’s royal gala!” he called out. As the winning driver Mark was set to be one of the guests of honour at the traditional post-race banquet which the Monaco royal family always threw after the grand prix. Christian didn’t wait to hear Mark’s response – he knew it already based on knowing his Aussie laid-back driver all too well with his aversion to all the glitz and glamour that the sport attracted – and he disappeared into his own office to dig out and change into some dry clothes.

“Ooops,” Mark muttered sheepishly.

Seb laughed. “Thought shorts and flip flops were in order?”

“Ah, shut it, mate! Not funny!” Mark shoved him playfully round the corner, but Seb lost his footing thanks to his sopping wet driving socks, and he slipped and promptly fell back and landed on his backside.

That caused Mark to laugh loudly.

“Ouch! That hurt!” Seb protested, half-heartedly, rubbing his back but not really having hurt himself at all.

“Oh, come on, mate!” Mark held out his hand, and Seb grabbed hold of it and hauled himself upright… but once he was standing in front of Mark, he didn’t let go.

“Seb?” Mark was puzzled by his team mate’s reluctance to let go.

Encouraged by the cherished memories of the closeness of the joyful hugs they’d shared to celebrate their success when they’d stepped from their cars in front of the royal box at the end of the race coupled with the outrageous celebrations on the top deck of the energy station culminating in the leap into the harbour together, a sudden spurt of courage shot through Seb. Yes, it could change the nature of their friendship for ever but it was the one thing he had fantasised about for far too long now, and it was the one thing he hadn’t had the guts to do anything about… until now.

Just a simple kiss.

Seb took a step forward, closing the distance between them completely. He raised a hand to curl it around Mark’s neck, tugged him closer and leaned forward. His heart was running like a freight train in his chest, and the spark that seemed to hit him when his lips met Mark’s, just felt amazing to him. But alas, he felt no response from Mark at all. Seb broke the tentative kiss, let go of his neck and stepped back. For a moment, neither of them said anything, and it was only nerves that made Seb finally speak.

“Mark…?” he started hesitantly, but couldn’t bring himself to say anything further.

Neither one of them seemed able to move. Seb bit his bottom lip nervously, starting to feel a fool for letting his emotions get so out of hand for once, but Mark just stood there in total shock at his team mate’s actions and as there continued to be no response from the older man who seemed frozen to the spot, the tension in the air around them seemed to simmer to boiling point and Seb began to freak out.

“Look, sorry! I should not have!” he panicked. “It did not happen. Forget it. Sorry!”

Like a frightened rabbit, Seb shoved his way past a still dumfounded Mark, hurriedly keyed in the pass number to his private rooms on the keypad, yanked open the door, and rushed inside before slamming it shut behind himself.

Mark was just stunned. He touched his lips with his fingertips. The gentle, cautious, tentative touch of Seb’s lips on his had brought to the fore feelings he’d fought to keep tucked away into the deep recesses of his mind ever since he’d laid eyes on the young German when he’d first appeared in the Formula One paddock back in 2006 at the Turkish Grand Prix as the third driver for BMW Sauber after Robert Kubica had stepped up to replace Jacques Villeneuve.

But there was something else that Seb didn’t know… Something that Mark had kept hidden from all but his family and very closest friends for as long as he could remember.

To those who truly didn’t know him, he was happily in a committed relationship with Ann, totally devoted to her, and she to him. But it was nothing more than a convenient cover, deemed necessary by both of them to protect his blossoming motorsport career when Ann, as his then manager, had secured sponsorship that was set to enable him to fulfil his hopes of racing in Europe. As he’d moved steadily up the motorsport ladder and finally achieved his dream of being a Formula One driver, they had continued to live the lie, growing more and more comfortable with their unusual relationship as the years went by. Yes, both of them had had one-night stands, relationships even, but nothing had turned out to be serious enough to jeopardise their secret arrangement. They were always there to support the other, and they knew that whatever the future held professionally or personally, that would never change.

The sound of a muffled sob from inside the room, brought Mark back to the here and now... and made his heart lurch. He felt so guilty for having frozen, but Seb’s hesitant kiss had totally and utterly knocked him for six. Never had he ever thought Seb might be interested in him - a man over ten years older than him, a man who yes, had become a friend but who was his team mate first and foremost, and thus his main rival. If Mark had thought there was even the slimmest of chances of something between them, he’d have snatched at it at the first opportunity. But now Seb had made the first move, and there was no way Mark knew he could let it slip by to be forgotten about until the darkest, loneliest moments when sleep would elude him thanks to a mind filled with thoughts of if only…

So he knocked gently on the door. “Seb! Come on, let me in. We need to talk.”

“Am sorry!” came the agitated response with a sob. “Forget it! I should not have done it. Blame the emotion of the day. Forget it!”

Mark tried the handle to the room, and found the door locked much to his extreme annoyance. “Come on, Seb!”

“Nein!” yelled the younger man. “It is okay! It did not happen!”

“Come on, Sebastian, please!” Mark pleaded. “We need to talk, and this is not the kind of conversation to have like this when we could be overheard!” the older man persisted. “I’m not leaving it like this, Seb, please! We can’t! You know we can’t! Please!”

The pleading tone in his voice must have clinched it for a few seconds later, Mark heard the lock being undone and the door slowly and cautiously opened a little way. Seb’s head poked out into the gap, his eyes red and damp with tears.

“Oh, Seb! I’m not angry with you! Really I’m not!”

Now it was Seb’s turn to look stunned.

“You mean that?” Seb asked incredulously.

Mark nodded. “You know me, mate – say it like it is. Now come on, let me in.”

Seb remained where he was for a second or two, not quite convinced that as soon as he opened the door wide enough, Mark wasn’t going to thump him. But then his team mate had never lied to him in the past… He was being silly, and after all, he was the one who’d risked their friendship with the kiss, and he had to find out one way or another just exactly how Mark felt. With a deep sigh in an attempt to gather himself together, Seb stood back and opened the door, letting Mark enter the small room.

With the door shut behind himself, Mark stood just a foot or two in front of Seb. The awkward silence between them was almost palpable, and Seb bit nervously on his bottom lip, trying totally to avoid looking at Mark.

"It is probably better if we both forget what happened,” Seb eventually said quietly, unable to take the silence anymore. “We should not complicate things. It’s hard enough to be friends when we are fighting on track so hard against each other, let alone if there was anything else."

"Seb, I can't forget it,” Mark insisted softly. “Do you really want to forget it?"

Seb couldn't bring himself to answer, and still couldn't even bring himself to look at Mark. But then Mark brought his hand up and gently caressed the side of his face… and Seb couldn’t help himself when he sighed softly with pleasure. He closed his eyes and leaned into the touch, allowing himself to drown in the sensation, savouring the moment, desperate to remember every single brief touch just in case it was the last time it ever happened.

Mark watched Seb’s face carefully, as the younger man relaxed. He was taken aback by how beautiful he thought Seb was, how sweet and innocent he seemed like this. It scared Mark a little, the way he so wanted to reach out and draw him closer, tenderly kiss him and make gentle love to him. But there were questions that had to be answered before this – whatever it was – could possibly progress any further. So reluctantly, Mark withdrew his hand from Seb’s face.

“Why did you kiss me, mate?” he demanded, his voice low and rough with urgency. Seb’s eyes opened wide and Mark flinched, guessing that his team mate thought it was anger in his voice. He felt a pang of guilt for that, but he just had to wait for an answer – he had to know why Seb had chosen now after all the months of working side by side to suddenly kiss him.

Seb’s response was equally low, but his was soft with defeat, indicating that by kissing Mark he felt he’d made a terrible mistake due to the lack of a reaction. “I just… I just needed to.” He sighed heavily and raked his fingers through his damp hair. Mark watched, feeling for him, but knowing that he had to hear Seb’s reason from Seb himself without any prompting. There was just too much at risk and there couldn’t be any misconceptions. “I never told anyone, not even Hannah, but I’ve always been attracted to men.” As soon as he uttered those words, Seb could see in Mark’s eyes that he knew he wasn’t telling him the complete truth and he shifted uneasily under the older man’s scrutiny. “Okay, it’s more than just attracted,” he admitted. “Women turn me on too, so I don’t think that makes me gay, but…”

Mark couldn’t do it anymore. He couldn’t watch the younger man tie himself up in knots over this. It hurt to watch, because Mark knew he wasn’t just attracted to him - he cared, probably far too much, though that scared him to admit it to himself let alone to the gorgeous young man stood in front of him. So he stepped closer and laid his hand on Seb’s shoulder, silencing him.

He watched him for a moment, before asking him quietly, “Seb… was kissing me an experiment? Did you need to because you had to find out what it was like?”

He could see the struggle in the younger man’s face. “No!” he insisted. “It’s not just any man, it’s just…“ Seb paused, gathering his courage, knowing that he’d started this and so really couldn’t back away from the truth just in case there was never another chance, no matter how awkward it might make things between them in the future. “It’s you,” he finally confessed, blushing. “Only you.”

Mark swallowed and asked his next question. “Do you want me to kiss you, Seb?” He didn’t let him answer right away, bringing a finger up to the German’s lips to silence him for a moment. “Think about your answer, mate, because if I kiss you, it won’t be the light, quick thing, like you kissed me just now. If I kiss you, I’ll kiss you like a lover, your lover, the lover I want to be.” Seb’s eyes widened in surprise at Mark’s words. Mark, in turn, wondered if he was pushing too hard, too fast, but dammit, there was only so much he could take. With the high emotion of the day, and after Seb had taken the first hesitant step, it was now it was up to him…

Gently, he outlined Seb’s lips with his forefinger as the younger man closed his eyes, once more savouring the touch again for a few sweet moments, before opening them and tenderly kissing the finger Mark had on his lips. Slowly Mark drew his hand away.

“Please, Mark,” Seb begged softly, his tongue flicking out to moisten his lips in hopeful anticipation. “Bitte…”

Seb watched as Mark lowered his head and brushed his lips against his mouth, finding himself fascinated as Mark’s hazel irises darkened with heightened arousal. Mark found Seb’s lips unbelievably soft, as smooth as stain, and tasting ever so slightly of champagne. His hand crept up into his hair, fingers tangling in the unruly, damp locks and his palm cupping the back of Seb’s head to press their mouths closer together. It started as a chaste peck of the lips but gradually as they both wanted more from the kiss, it became sexier, longer, and highly erotic, and yet still the kiss was also deliciously romantic and simple. Seb had never felt so overwhelmed by a kiss before. The sensations from his mouth were travelling down through his body as if his tongue and rapidly hardening cock were directly connected. He felt it right down to his toes, which curled inside his damp socks.

He finally managed to pulled away long enough to gasp, “Mein Gott!”

Mark chuckled, but Seb’s lips were immediately re-occupied as Mark returned to kissing him. When Mark ran his tongue over Seb’s lips, he opened them a little to let him begin a gentle exploration. Seb was all submission – open and soft, sweet and yielding. Mark swept his tongue through Seb’s mouth, tasting and licking his way through the warmth. The kiss became deep and hard, taking no prisoners but making sure he was well-tasted. To Seb, it was as if the entire world had disappeared – there was just him and Mark. He couldn’t breathe, he couldn’t think, and he just didn’t care.

Mark lifted his head to kiss his ear, and nibbled on the lobe, licking along the outer edge of his ear. When lips found his hot spot under his ear, Seb couldn’t help but let out a soft, needy groan, and it sent a thrill of triumph through Mark, that he could still make a much younger man want him. Tangling his fingers in Mark’s thick hair, Seb brought their lips back together wanting so much more. Mark nibbled on Seb’s lower lip again before Seb accepted his invasion once more. Cupping the back of his head, Mark tipped Seb deeper into the kiss, wringing pleasure out of him as evident by the little, needy noises that were pouring out of the youngster. The passionate kiss became more aggressive, but they were simply expressing the feelings, the desires, the long pent-up longing that each had for the other. Their hearts were pounding, their heads spinning with emotion and their whole bodies desperate with desire but then Mark pulled back, his warm breath blowing against Seb’s moist, kiss-swollen lips.

“Why did you stop?! Don’t stop… “ Seb asked, almost frantic with need, frightened that if they stopped, the intimacy between them would never be repeated.

“I want more, so much more but we can’t risk it – not here,” Mark admitted, regretfully letting his sensible side take command of the situation.

Seb’s shoulders sagged but he knew Mark was right. Anyone could come in right now – Tommi, Britta, Rocky, Christian… They all knew the combination to the electronic lock on the door.

Mark reached out and gently slipped his fingers under Seb's chin and tilted his face upwards so he could look him in the eyes.

“Oh Sebi, I have wanted you since the moment I first saw you in the paddock,” Mark whispered truthfully.

Seb was puzzled. “But you aren’t into men – you have Ann?”

“Convenient cover. She’s my manager, my business partner, my closest friend and we share a house, but that’s as far as it goes,” Mark confessed. “It was her idea when she caught me back in Oz fooling around in a motorhome with a mechanic who was on the Formula Three team I was driving for, just when she’d secured this huge sponsorship deal for me to come and race in England.”

Seb was stunned by Mark’s revelation. Yes, he’d heard odd rumours in the paddock about a team member and even a driver being gay from time to time but had never really taken any notice simply because the rumours never seemed to be anything but hushed whispers that even the press hounds never heard or, more likely, never followed up for fear of loss of their media accreditation or even law suits. But how on earth had he missed that his own team mate was gay?! Mark certainly didn’t look like or act like a stereotypical gay man in Seb’s eyes, with his rugged sun-tanned Aussie looks and his love of sports.

“Let’s face it,” Mark said with just a touch of sadness in his voice. “Do you really think I would have gotten to where I have today if I’d been open about being gay? 

Although he’d never come across any evidence, Seb just couldn’t for one minute believe that in the male dominated sport in which they participated in, the knowledge that someone, especially a driver, was openly gay would be tolerated. Homosexuality just didn’t go with the sport’s glamorous, womanising image. Yes, in public it would be tolerated with an out pouring of support, but behind the scenes Seb felt sure that it would be a different story: the companies that offered sponsorship might not want their products or services associated with someone who was gay for fear of alienating those who didn’t approve of such relationships, and the threat of withdrawing money from a team surely would lead to a driver not being signed just solely because of his “unacceptable” sexual orientation.

“No,” Seb admittedly sadly. He sighed heavily and asked, “So what now?”

“What do you honestly want, Seb?”

Seb bit his bottom lip nervously, his initial spurt of courage in instigating the initial kiss now having deserted him.

“We can leave it here, try to pretend nothing happened…” Mark suggested slowly, hoping that that was the last thing his team mate wanted.

“No!” interrupted Seb forcefully. “I don’t want to. But what do you want? 

Mark smiled. “I’ve already told you I wanted you from the moment I first saw you in the paddock. Strewth, you are gorgeous,” Mark breathed.

Seb blushed and ducked his head. “Thank you,” he murmured and Mark chuckled, pressing another quick kiss to his lips.

“But the decision has to be yours. I’ve got a few more years in this game if I’m lucky. But you, you’re still young and have the talent to be a great world champion. 

At Mark’s glowing praise, Seb couldn’t help but blush once more. It meant a lot, coming from the older, more experienced and well-respected driver. “You too.”

“Maybe, with luck like today. But you have youth on your side and this is fast becoming a young man’s game. And as much as I love driving the cars, I could really do without all the PR and glitz and the glamour. That’s just not me. Besides which, I really would like to go back to Le Mans and endurance racing at some point,” Mark admitted. “Have unfinished business there.”

Seb closed his eyes and tried to wish Mark’s last comments away, wanting desperately to ignore them. He couldn’t imagine, no, didn’t want to imagine Red Bull without Mark as his team mate… and he’d never felt that way about any other team mate during his racing career. There was just something different about Mark, something that had Seb infatuated with him, and it scared him to think that way because feeling this way about a man was all so new for him.

“Look, I’m not going lie to you, mate, that’s not my style. I want you, Seb, in more ways than you can ever imagine… but a relationship between us would never be easy. I’m more than ten years older than you, being rivals on the same team would be bound to lead to conflict at some point, then there’ll be the need for secrecy…” Mark sighed. He so wanted Seb, but the last thing he wanted to do was let the man dive into a relationship with him without seriously taking into account all the possible pitfalls. And he certainly wasn’t going to start anything off with him by lying to him – whether directly or by omission. “And I’m at a point where I’m starting to want something more than just a fuck buddy. I have that already in the paddock,” he confessed 

Surprised, Seb looked at him quizzically, wondering, with a sudden pang of jealousy, just who Mark was referring to, but the Aussie didn’t expand.

“If you want this to go further, you have to be sure, Seb, sure that if a relationship with me leaks out, you are going to be strong enough to withstand the fall out, that it’s not going to ruin the prospect of you being the world champion we know you will be. I’ve been around this paddock for longer than you, and although I know there are some closet gays about, the media attention will be the least of your worries. We might drive for the rebel team on the grid, but I’m not even sure Red Bull would really stand for their two drivers being in an openly gay relationship. Their public voice might say one thing, but privately?”

“I know what I want, Mark,” Seb said determinedly.

“Do you? Have you really thought about this? Or is it just some crazy idea brought on due to heat of the moment when high on adrenalin from the race and the celebrations?”

Seb was silent, Mark’s words making him think.

“You need to be so sure,” persisted Mark. “You have so much more to lose than me.”

“I have thought about it!” Seb insisted forcefully.

“Yeah right – when you thought it could be no more than a fantasy. This is real, Seb,” Mark asserted. “I’ve been around the motorsport world longer than you, and I can guarantee you that the fall-out from someone being outed as gay or bisexual won’t be pleasant, let alone two team mates in a relationship. I’m more hardened to it all than you. I couldn’t give a damn anymore what people think of me.”

“No, you’re not!”

 “Yes I am,” Mark retorted. “I’ve had to struggle to get where I am. You’ve been in the Red Bull family for longer than I’ve been racing in F1. You’ve been cosseted and nurtured, groomed for success through their driver development programme, shielded from the nasty, cut-throat side of this business.”

Seb couldn’t deny anything – because what Mark was saying was perfectly true. Ever since he’d been spotted by Red Bull as a young kid in karts, all he’d had to do was deliver on the track in style and that was something he was pretty good at, and then everything else had just fallen into place – chances and contracts landing in his lap, and he’d grabbed hold of them tight with both hands, making the most of every single opportunity that came his way. Mark, on the other hand, had had his career hindered from the start by the mere fact that he’d been born in Australia, a continent where motorsport opportunities were few and far between. It wasn’t helped by the fact that he’d gone into karts late as a teenager and despite his natural talent, he’d had to move half way round the world to pursue his ambitions, having to fight tooth and nail to get sponsorship, having to broker deals and borrow money left, right and centre to get himself drives before finally achieving his dream of driving in F1.

“And I’ve had years of practising how to hide who I really am, and believe me, it’s not been easy,” Mark admitted with some sadness. His thoughts drifted back to a special love he’d lost when the pressure of needing to hide had become so great that it had destroyed a precious, secret relationship. He’d become hardened in recent years thanks to that, putting up barriers around his heart, enjoying male company when the opportunity arose, but never letting anything become too serious for fear of being hurt again. But now there was Seb and he so wanted to let him in, craved to share more than just a friendship with him now that Seb had shown more than just a friendly interest in him, but Mark was so desperate to protect himself by making sure it was what Seb truly wanted as well because he wasn’t sure he could survive falling so hard for someone ever again only for it to disintegrate into an irreparable mess.

Mark pulled his mind back to the present and to the man who he so wanted as his lover who stood before him. “I’m not going anywhere. So you take as much time as you need to think seriously about what I’ve said, mate,” he said. “I want you so much, Sebi, have done for a long time. But you have to be more than sure it’s what you truly want too.”

Mark took a single step back from Seb but then changed his mind. He leaned across to gently press his lips against the younger man’s mouth. He swallowed the gasp that came out of Seb’s mouth and lifted a hand to press it against the back of his head, spearing his fingers through the younger man’s hair, lightly gripping the strands to tilt his head back. He ran the tip of his tongue across Seb’s lips, seeking entrance and when Seb’s mouth opened wider, Mark pressed home his advantage, his tongue mapping out every crevice of Seb’s mouth as it duelled with Seb’s. Finally, when he couldn’t keep kissing without passing out from lack of air, Mark lifted his head and opened his eyes, wondering when on earth they’d closed. He smiled down into Seb’s flushed face and caressed the younger man’s cheek with his hand.

“You’re so addictive,” Mark whispered the words into his lips. “And you taste so good.”

“You taste good, too, and I think you are far more addictive than anyone I’ve met.”

“Strewth, you are such a wicked temptation!” Mark muttered.

Seb stopped their words with another slow kiss.

Mark let Seb have it, opening to the other man, unable to resist, especially with the nagging fear in the back of his mind that these precious moments might be all they would ever share. Seb heard every moan, paid attention to each and every one, paid attention to each and every shiver. He focused totally on Mark, trying desperately to memorise everything. It all was just so intoxicating. Seb groaned into the kiss as Mark’s tongue invaded his mouth, claiming him again, sending yet more shivers of pleasure through him. How on earth could he contemplate ever forgetting that this had ever happened? The kiss was something hungry and enticing, and knew he would never, ever be able to get enough.

Again, Mark broke away but this time he took a determined step back, leaving Seb to stand there, breathing heavily with passionate emotion.

“Just please think about this really seriously, Seb, with all its possible consequences, good and bad. Make sure it’s what you really want,” Mark insisted yet again. With a deep sigh of regret, he went to leave, but with his hand on the door handle, he looked back at Seb, feeling torn between knowing that he had to make sure the German fully knew and accepted what could be letting himself in for, and yet desperately wanting to take him in his arms and just love him. “You take as long as need, Seb. I’ll wait for you. Remember that.”

With that, Mark took a deep breath as if trying desperately to recompose himself, then opened the door and stepped out into the corridor, quickly closing it, forcing himself not to look back, not trusting himself to rush back and pull Seb into his loving arms again.

Seb stood, staring at the closed door, still a little shocked about how a split second decision to kiss his team mate which he could have easily blamed on the high emotional adrenalin rush of the day, had morphed into the possibility of something out of his wildest wet dreams.

But Mark’s words couldn’t help but echo round his mind and he knew he had some serious thinking to do. The kisses had left in no doubt that he wanted more, but could he really risk everything and take that leap into the unknown?


End file.
